Moped on eBay

InactiveX · Post by **InactiveX** » Tue Mar 02, 2004 9:35 am

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll? ... 2462765431

I know what I'd like to do to him with his b#starding moped. Repeatedly.

I *hate* him! #HATE# him I tell you!

GRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!

Post by **Derek** » Tue Mar 02, 2004 11:33 am

InactiveX · Post by **InactiveX** » Tue Mar 02, 2004 1:38 pm

Derek, what you must understand is that this little scroat gets everywhere.

He advertises for Sainsburys (big supermarket chain), using his friends and family and being unbearably cheerful (which we Brits don't like).

The bookshops are stuffed with his cookery manuals, each one bearing his supremely punchable face.

He used to play drums in a band called Scarlet Division, who only achieved any popularity because he was in it. Their single barely troubled the Top 100, meaning it would have sold only a few dozen copies. Probably to the afore-mentioned friends and family.

He has released an album called "Jamie Oliver's Cookin': Music To Cook By".

He talks like he's a London Cockney Wide-Boy, even though he was brought up in a middle-class home in Oxfordshire.

He is commonly referred to as "Fat Tongue", on account of his oversized facial appendage which is always covered in too much saliva.

He uses irritating words and phrases like "pukka", "lovely-jubbly" and "sorted". Purely because he thinks it's "cool" and "down wiv da kidz".

If you need any further convincing on how much he is reviled, go here:

http://www.dogbomb.co.uk/board/showthre ... genumber=1

Glad I got that off my chest. Where's my valium? I'm having a bad day...

hyperspace · Post by **hyperspace** » Tue Mar 02, 2004 8:46 pm

He did seem too cutesy when ever I watched him. I hear you InactiveX!

davd_bob · Post by **davd_bob** » Wed Mar 03, 2004 12:42 am

i bet he's got money too. it just ain't right

.

InactiveX · Post by **InactiveX** » Wed Mar 03, 2004 9:44 am

I wouldn't swap places with him for all the money in the world. Imagine the abuse he must get whenever he leaves the house.

Post by **Derek** » Thu Mar 04, 2004 11:24 am

So I take it you don't like the guy?

/me hides

kuun · Post by **kuun** » Thu Mar 04, 2004 12:56 pm

jeez

everyone hates him cause he knows how to make money...

heh

InactiveX · Post by **InactiveX** » Thu Mar 04, 2004 1:59 pm

Oh no, it something quite apart from that. Something far more profound.

Dave Rave · Post by **Dave Rave** » Fri Mar 05, 2004 3:44 am

InactiveX wrote:Oh no, it something quite apart from that. Something far more profound.

yeh yeh, he stole your girlfriend

ran over your dog

says "say Hi to your mum"

sold uranium to Saddam

helped Osama plan 911

uhm, and his omelets stink....

and he lives too damned close to France

kuun · Post by **kuun** » Sun Mar 07, 2004 4:20 pm

well dude.

i've done alot of thinking.. and my question is.. have you ever seen him when he's not on tv? or whatever? do you knwo what he's like when he's at home? he may just be like you.. shit if i got paid to i'd act al lcheery on tv and crap.. lots of people do it and hate it.. but its all for the money

InactiveX · Post by **InactiveX** » Mon Mar 08, 2004 12:17 pm

Nope, and I have no wish to. The way I see it, he's put himself into the public domain so people are entitled to have an opinion on his TV persona.

But hey, don't take it all so seriously!

Dave Rave · Post by **Dave Rave** » Mon Mar 08, 2004 5:15 pm

wouldn't it be better if he was part of two fat lipped gits in a motorcycle, and he wasn't anymore, then we wouldn't have to watch the other no-body.

agree with the accent, and he's too smooth, and damn, he is making money and we ain't.